Chopping Mall
Chopping Mall was my first blog, which I started way back in 2009. It was dedicated exlcusively to ridiculous and terrible films, which I watched a lot of back then. (So much time, so little work!)
I’ve resuced the posts from oblivion, to be preserved here for …uh… whatever.
It’s a pretty clunky process getting them out of blogspot (XML export, eww) and into here, so there may be a few formatting issues.
Bird with the Crystal Plumage
From one to the next!
Tonight’s film was Bird with the Crystal Plumage (L’uccello dalle Piume de Cristallo) which was another that I’d seen before but, once again, was none the worse for it.
My entry for this one will be much shorter. Mostly because I’m much more tired today, but partly also because the film is, in my eyes at least, somewhat less remarkable. It makes a fairly neat comparison against Opera though, mostly because nearly every flaw I found in Opera is corrected here.
Yesterday I pointed out that Opera’s music left something to be desired; here, a certain Mr Ennio Morricone steps in to create a score that bursts with energy when it needs to, broods menacingly at times and jangles its merry way through the film. Similarly, the actual plot - another weak spot in Opera - is phenomenally tight here. Mystery and suspense lurk at every set-piece and in ever shadow. I challenge any viewer not to spend the entire film guessing at who’s responsible for the series of grisly deaths handed out to the poor victims.
Yet, for all this, it simply doesn’t have the sheer atmosphere that makes Opera so thrilling. The camera, although rarely short of wonderful, doesn’t drag us, biting at our nails, into the story in the same way as yesterday’s film and this is telling of the film as a whole. It’s fascinating, it’s captivating, it’s beautiful but yet it never quite achieves the intensity of Opera.
If I’m damning it with faint praise, I must apologise. Bird with the Crystal Plumage is by no means a bad, or even mediocre film. It’s a great film. It tells a compelling story and it tells it very well indeed. But this is perhaps all it does; it is a brilliant story, but never quite manages to be a brilliant cinematic experience.
Note: It only occurred to me to check the date of this film as an afterthought. This is Argento’s first film as director, some 17 years before he directed Opera and perhaps this explains the points I highlight. This is a much more ’traditional’ film than Opera, a film that obeys more of the normal ‘rules’. In some respects, it’s the better for it, but in terms of a cinematic experience it merely hints at what he was to achieve later.
Opera
So, part one of Chopping Mall’s Dario Argento Week is his 1987 masterpiece Opera.
This is pitched, as a few of his films are, somewhere between straight up giallo whodunit and a tense psychological horror. With gruesome death scenes. So, you could say, it manages to do a bit of everything that’s awesome about Italian cinema. Except Westerns. There are certainly no cowboys…
The basic premise sees Betty called in at the last minute to perform in the opera of MacBeth. The famous curse of the Scottish play has struck down the intended Lady MacBeth, leaving the role wide open for the young and inexperienced Betty. She steps up to the mark - and gets rave reviews - but from this moment on things really start to go wrong: lights crash to the floor on the opening night, staff members are found dead and then Betty encounters a mysterious masked man…
This guy, it turns out, has quite a sadistic edge to him and happily tied her up, tapes needles to the bottom of her eyes - so she can’t close her eyes in horror, of course - and then precedes to stab her lover in front of her. Through the throat.
I shan’t elaborate too much on the rest of the plot, as that would spoil the surprise, although perhaps that wouldn’t matter too much. To my mind, the weakest element of Opera is that I really don’t care that much who’s responsible for the murders and - I suspect - Argento doesn’t either. The combination of surprisingly few clues or half-remembered vital details (especially in comparison to some of his other films…) and the sheer indulgence of the murders (lookout for the one with the keyhole…) suggest that this is a film that’s concerned less with who’s doing the crime than er… simply enjoying watching the crime.
Its real strong point however is the astonishingly brilliant camera work. I suspect I’m going to have to spend most of this week hunting out alternative superlatives for the cinematography in Argento’s films, but for now I must say that the visual element of Opera is simply stunning. It’s hard to do it justice in screenshots, simply because this is less about camera angles than about camera movement; Argento’s camera leads us through the film, ducking behind curtains, drawing back ominously, following the heels of characters as they walk. This is the real magic of the film; we never simply watch the action but rather are immersed in it. Argento throws the viewer into the scene, compelling us to watch the grisly details as surely as if it were our eyes that were forced open by needles.
Opera is certainly not everyone’s film, it’s certainly not simply a murder mystery and it’s certainly not the best constructed story you’ll watch/read/encounter. What it is, however, is utterly compelling viewing, visually astonishing and an awful lot of fun.
The only remaining points to note are the brilliance of the crows - surely the most threatening birds in cinema after those of The Birds - and, less brilliantly, the appalling choices made in the soundtrack. With brilliant excerpts of opera music, it seems such a shame to throw in the odd chunk of metal-ish guitar rock, which in most cases simply kills the atmosphere. It’s a far cry, say, from the dipping-with-tension(-and-blood) soundtrack to Suspiria….
Dario Argento week!
CC licenced photo by Brian Eeles via Wikimedia
This Sunday, the National Media Museum, as part of the Bradford International Film Festival’s Widescreen Weekend - a festival strand devoted to screening classic examples of gorgeously presented films - are showing Suspiria by Italian director Dario Argento.
Now I love the Dario Argento films I’ve seen. More than that, I consider Suspiria one of my favourite films ever. Although the story might not be anything too remarkable, the visual style and the brooding music add up to create one of the most beautiful, tense and atmospheric pieces of film I’ve ever seen. And I never thought I’d get to see it on a big screen!
Needless to say, I am slightly very excited!
So, between now and Sunday, what better way to anticipate the event than by watching seven other of Argento’s films? And writing about them here, of course.
Over the next seven days, I shall watch (in an as yet undecided order)
Profondo Rosso, The Bird with the Crystal Plumage, Opera, 4 mosche di velluto grigio, Tenebrae, Cat O’ Nine Tails and Phenomena.
Buy Tickets to Supiria
Check out the Bradford International Film Festival
One Day Later...
Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear.
The Oscars results are quite astonishingly, gloriously, exquisitely DULL!
Best Picture - T** K***’s S*****
Best Director - T** K***’s S*****
Best Actor - T** K***’s S*****
Best Original Screenplay - T** K***’s S*****
Best Title - T** K***’s S*****
Best Coffee On Set - T** K***’s S*****
Best Taste in Shoes -T** K***’s S*****
Best Idea - T** K***’s S*****
Best friend - T** K***’s S*****
Best best - T** K***’s S*****
Best ever - T** K***’s S*****
Best cute Brits - T** K***’s S*****
Oh and the Social Network, The Fighter and Inception got some for nice sound and/or supporting people. Or for making films that we’ve basically seen before. Thanks.
Last Minute Oscars Choices
[CC Licenced image by Dave_B_]
Ok, ok, so they’re about to give out some supposedly important film awards very soon.
I haven’t seen loads of the films that are nominated. Does this matter? Psshhh, nah! Where’s the fun in making informed, reasonable choices. These are made on hearsay, fragments of knowledge and instinct alone!
Here’s the list, we’ll see tomorrow if the real people got it right and matched me.
Best Picture
“Black Swan,” - Nah. It’s good but… not really all that.
“The Fighter” Nah, not seen this.
“Inception,” If we make it open-ended, will people think it’s half-assed or will they think it’s genius? Apparently, the latter.
“The Kids Are All Right,” Wha’?
“The King’s Speech,” Seriously. I never want to hear these three words again.
“127 Hours,” James Franco chews his own arm off. Well done.
“The Social Network,” No. I don’t want to watch this. Go away.
“Toy Story 3” Has deserved winner stamped all over it.
“True Grit” Fabulous. Better than Toy Story? Probably not.
“Winter’s Bone” …Same as with True Grit. Love it, but it doesn’t beat Toy Story.
Actor in a Leading Role
Javier Bardem in “Biutiful” I like Javier Bardem. Haven’t seen this though.
Jeff Bridges in “True Grit” Yes.
Jesse Eisenberg in “The Social Network” RraaaRRrrGGHH, Go away.
Colin Firth in “T** K***’s S*****” Stop it! Stop it!
James Franco in “127 Hours” But he’s the Green Goblin…
Actor in a Supporting Role
“T** K***’s S*****” again? Make it stop! This one clearly goes to:
John Hawkes in “Winter’s Bone”
Actress in a Leading Role
Loads of good choices here. Both these are good:
Jennifer Lawrence in “Winter’s Bone”
Natalie Portman in “Black Swan”
but we have a winner:
Michelle Williams in “Blue Valentine” She was brilliant.
Actress in a Supporting Role
I’ve seen almost none of these.
Hailee Steinfeld in “True Grit”
wins by default. “T** K***’s S*****” can go take a hike.
Animated Feature Film
I really want to see
“The Illusionist” Sylvain Chomet
but if I made Toy Story my Best Film, it’d peobably better take this prize as well.
“Toy Story 3” Lee Unkrich
Art Direction
I don’t really know what this award means
Cinematography
“True Grit,” by Roger Deakins, was beautiful
Director
Either
“Black Swan,” Darren Aronofsky which was amazingly well put together.
or
“True Grit,” Joel Coen and Ethan Coen
Not “T** K***’s S*****”
Aaaaaaand I think I’ll stop there. The other categories can sort themselves out. The Documentaries award should be interesting and I plan on watching most of them but… as I’ve basically seen none of the shorts listed, it seems a little pointless even to speculate.
The one massively embarrassing thing to admit is that I’ve not seen a single one of the foreign film selection. How has that been allowed to happen? Best sort this out soon!
Just for the record, they are:**
Foreign Language Film**
“Biutiful,” Mexico
“Dogtooth,” Greece
“In a Better World,” Denmark
“Incendies,” Canada
“Outside the Law (Hors-la-loi),” Algeria